BK Mega Weekend Extravaganza!

Brendan Kelly - A few garbage L.A. bands (3/27/15 @ The Mint, Los Angeles CA) / Brendan Kelly - Joey Briggs - Dead Frets  (3/28/15 @ Slidebar, Fullerton CA)

My penis can only get so erect

Holy fucking shit what a weekend. It started Thursday night when I completely forgot I said I'd go down to North Park to check out our buddies bands first show. They are called Old News and they were pretty good. Minus the sound guy fucking up and not having Ricky's microphone on or whatever happened. But they totally covered Dillinger 4 and Kid Dynamite and that's rad. Also, a band called Fools Rush played, and they fucking ruled. So dragging my old ass out on a school night super ended up being worth it.

Friday, I finally ended my strike against L.A. Its been a few months since I went up that way, and it mostly had to do with "eh, I just don't feel like driving there." But when any incarnation of BK playing music comes anywhere near you, you suck it up and fucking go. We waited outside the bar for a bit for our friend to show up, and some place was cooking street food outside. I was hungry and tempted by the smell, so of course I ended up ordering a hot dog wrapped in bacon. You know, every once in a while you just have to treat yo self to a street dog. It was sitting outside waiting where I could hear the first band playing. It sounded like absolute shit. Then the second band played and I started to get really confused. They also sounded like absolute shit. Both bands so far was this weird, alternative indie garbage music. The only thought I had in my head is who books these fucking shows? I remember when I saw the Lawrence Arms play L.A. a few years ago at the Viper room, that show also had the weirdest fucking bands. Anyway, Keri finally shows up and we go inside and get our $10 drinks. Now around this point, I'm watching the 3rd band set up. They bring out the drums and bass, and I'm like "OK. normal." But then they set up a keyboard hooked up to a Mac Book, a drum machine, and seriously a rack with 8 guitars on it. I went from OK, to what the fuck is happening? And then they start playing. OK, I get that everyone has differing opinions on music, and yeah, I might not like what you like, but holy fucking shit these guys were boring. Every song you could hear the desperate cries of "please play this song on the radio." For some reason the guy who sang and played guitar switched to a new guitar after every single song, explaining the rack. The lady who sang and played keyboard more or less just stood there and kept raising her arms up and down, like she was trying to fly away in slow motion. The other guitarist and bass player just stood in their respective corners, I'm pretty sure they were under strict orders to stay the fuck out of the way. I will say this though: both singers had great voices. And they did call themselves out towards the end. They said something like, I know its weird that Brendan Kelly is playing and he is a rocker, and here we are playing our indie bullshit, so we wrote a rock song specifically for this show. Granted, it absolutely did not qualify as a rock song, but they do get an A for effort.

Finally Brendan Kelly took the stage and all became right in the world .I was a little nervous at first because he sounded fucking hammered, but then I remembered its BK, it totally wouldn't be the same if he was sober. He started by saying he is going to play like 4 or 5 songs he wants to play and then 4 or 5 songs we wanted to hear. Off the top of my head, I know he played Necrotism, Demons, Seventeener, and YMCA. He also played 2 never before heard songs, an awesome song called Hugs, which was obviously about acquiring hugs through sketchy means , and a song he wrote when he was 12 called Dicks. I think you can figure that one out. When he asked us what we wanted to hear, some guy immediately shouted Suffer the Children and BK looked him dead in the eyes and called him a pervert. Somehow, through people screaming at him, he ended up playing Pigs, Quicentuple, Dance of the Doomed, Drunk Tweets, and my absolute personal favorite Unicorn Odyssey. We laughed, we cried, we drank, I never thought I could be so entertained by a drunk and a guitar.

Pictured: Good times

Night two I piled eight people into my 4Runner and headed to Fullerton. The Slidebar is pretty cool because all the shows there are free. It was kind of a weird set up though, it has a back room for the show, and the front becomes this weird club/bar scene. It was bizarre. But I did get to hang out with Brendan Kelly for about 20 minutes because of it, so that was pretty cool. The show was more of the same, except this time the openers made sense. Dead Frets (aka Jared from Sic Waiting) and Joey Briggs played. They both were really good and warmed up the crowd for BK, who did another drunken comedy set intermixed with tunes. I was a little drunker this night, so my memory is a bit fuzzier, but the set was completely different (minus the still awesome Hugs song). I do remember at one point I said something was "tight" a little louder then I expected and BK was like, "wow, what a fucking OC thing to say" which I replied with "Bro, just play the next fucking song, bro."

Pictured: Slightly Darker Good Times

Sunday, somehow I managed to get out of bed and head to the bowling alley for another very long Sunday Funday with a bunch of good friends. All in all I would rank this weekend up there with one of the best of the year so far. I was only 2 hours late to work on Monday! Not bad at all.

I got my fingers crossed we get a new Falcon record this year. But in the meantime, go buy Caskitt's new album This Machine Kills Sadness. It's super good and you won't regert it! Promise!

Have You Ever Seen Subhumans...On Weed? - A Wrecktrospective

The following story takes place in September of 2007...

I was talking to my friend Buddy Andrew a few weeks ago. He lives a very interesting life. He has had the same job at this pizza place forever. He is room mates with this rich guy, and they live in a massive house with a tennis court, and a pool that goes inside the house to a room with a shuffleboard table. However, he doesn't have access to the internet. He was a vegetarian FOREVER, but one day showed up at our friends house with a bag full of In and Out burgers and said fuck it. He has thrown up AND bled in my old truck. He had the same haircut Rod Stewart has, and I'm pretty sure he only owns 1 pair of cut off black jean shorts and 1 pair of shoes. This is Andrew. So when I was talking to him, he said he heard of my blog through people at work and wanted me to include him in a story. This is that story.

One day, Andrew calls me up and says he has an extra ticket to go see The Subhumans play at Soma in San Diego. Truthfully, Subhumans aren't really my style but I said fuck it, let's get weird, I'm in. So we cruise down to San Diego, and park, and realize we are a little early. We go over to the grocery store across the street to buy some beer while we are waiting, and somehow decide on buying a 12 pack of Mickey's Grenades. I think it was because they had the riddles under the cap, but this was 8 years ago so who knows. So we are just hanging out in his car, drinking and solving riddles like Batman, when the car starts shaking. First thought is, oh shit, policia. Turns out, it was just 3 kids who work with Andrew at the pizza place. When I say kids, I mean kids. Maybe 17 or 18. They pile into the back of his Saturn and crack open their beers that they somehow got. We drink all the beers we have between us and realize we missed the first band that played, so we decide to head in. After the kids get out and head in, Andrew 's like hey I got this pipe and some weed, want to smoke it before we go in? I'm kind of drunk at this point and am already stressing about not fitting in with the tru punks inside, and I did promise to get weird, so i say hell yeah, light that shit up! (Probably not those exact words. Ever.) I very very very rarely smoke pot, so naturally I got super duper high. Which was a terrible mistake for where I was heading.

We walk up to security, and I am already freaking out. I know they are going to catch me being high, I'm going to jail, oh fuck, oh fuck, why did I do this? That type of paranoid stuff. Looking back on it, half the people in that building were probably high, including the bouncers, and I made it in no problem. We walk into the giant stage room, and this place is fucking packed. The band Witch Hunt is playing (that band rules by the way) and we start pushing our way towards the front. I feel like a ghost, and I'm just floating through the crowd. We stop just outside of the pit and stand there and watch the band. As I'm watching, I still just feel like I'm floating, and I'm getting bumped into by the most disgusting crust punks on the face of the earth. Dreads are brushing by my face. Unwashed vests with studs are poking me in the shoulder. Or at least, that's whats going through my mind. I'm trying to watch this band I'm actually enjoying, and praying to god that I don't get ring worm. But I still don't move from this spot the entire show. The floating has stopped and I am now an anchor sinking into the sea of people bustling about me. I kind of just zone out and concentrate on being solid. Until MDC plays John Wayne was a Nazi, and I snap out of it for a moment, brought back to life by familiarity. But then I'm right back to it. I'm less of an anchor at this point and more of a sea cucumber, just kind of swaying along with the current. I do this through the rest of MDC and Subhumans set. After they play their encore songs, I look at Andrew, he looks at me, we kind of just nod at each other, and book it back to the car and go the fuck home.

The MINUTE I walk into my house, I jumped in the shower to wash the grossness off me. I'll be damned if I get tetanus or lockjaw.

Lesson learned: Don't get high and go to a punk show. Don't get high and go to a show. Don't get high.

Half Hearts and Korn - A Wrecktrospective

The following story takes place in July of 2005...

First some background information. I graduated high school in 2003 at the ripe old age of 17. Sometime in 2004 I was kicked out of my moms house because at the time she was bat shit crazy controlling and didn't like that I was 3 houses down at my buddy's past 9pm or whatever. For sure the words, "but I'm 18 now mom, I don't have to listen to you" were uttered. She basically said come home now, or don't bother ever coming back. So I grabbed my very few possessions (a bed and a dresser) and bailed. I ended up setting up shop in my friend Nathan and Jay's apartment in the living room. It was also around this time I quit my job at a grocery store and started working for the plumbing company I currently work for, driving around parts and stuff. Basically I had to wake up at 6am every morning, and living in a living room of a bunch of 19 year olds party apartment was a little counterproductive. I didn't want to be a turd, but staying up until 4am every night just wasn't working. Sure, I could do 1 or 2am here and there, but there were several times I fell asleep while driving on the freeway only to wake up a few miles down the road like, dude what the fuck? It was fucking scary. So when the lease on their place was up, I casually mentioned "hey, lets get Kevin his own bedroom, huh?"

We moved into a 3 bedroom apartment in Oceanside and continued our shitty existence. Drinking and Top Ramen and more drinking. Once we forgot to pay the electricity bill and instead of fixing it, we filled the kitchen sink with ice and beer and said, "this will do." Another time we ran out of alcohol, and sat on the back porch smoking cigarettes and drinking mouth wash. What I'm trying to tell you is we were those piece shit youths, enjoying being out on our own in the big bad world.

2005 was a pretty embarrassing year for me musically. Have you ever gone back and listened to music you used to be stoked on and just shuddered? Look, I liked good music as well, but for every Hot Water Music there was a Rufio. For every Against Me! there was From Autumn To Ashes. Let's just say I felt right at home and was legitimately stoked for Warped Tour 2004 and 05.

A random Tuesday in July I made my almost weekly trip to Lou's records to blindly buy some CD's, because that's what I did. This was pre-internet band stuff. If you wanted to find new bands you read the thank you section of the liner notes or bought a compilation CD. Never heard this band, but fuck it, they are on this record label, or I saw another band wear their shirt, so I'll probably enjoy it. One of the CD's I bought was Paradise, Found by a band called Fight Paris. They were on Trustkill records, so how bad could they be? The answer was very, very bad, but I didn't know that yet. The only thing I knew about the band before hand was they liked Rock N' Roll, partying and fucking. (The opening track of the album is called Fuck Me Stilettos and starts with the classy line, "Damn right that sluts my bitch, she fucking sucked my god damn..." Seriously. Those are the words they chose to start their album.) I bought a good handful of CD's that day, so I didn't have a chance to even listen to it before later that same night we get a phone call from a friend of a friend who says "this band called Fight Paris just played a show and needs a place to stay tonight." I was pumped. Fuck yes, this band who's CD I just bought wants to stay at our place? And they party? I Party! Let's do it! (This was before I got into the DIY scene, and realized most bands you can drink with and talk to. But for young 19 year old Kevin, this was amazing.)

So these fucking guys and our friend and some random lady who called us show up at our apartment. First thing I notice is one of the band members is missing. "Isn't there 5 of you guys?" I inquire. "Yeah, but (so and so) won't leave the van because she (points to the girl) said she won't fuck him tonight." And so the night begins. These so called party animals brought a 24 pack of Coors Light, so there was that. One of the guys saw our Nintendo 64 we had hooked up and immediately challenged Nathan to a game of NFL Blitz, and proceeded to get his ass whooped for half an hour until he finally just gave up. Meanwhile, I was talking to one of the band members and he was explaining how "yeah, they like to party hard" and they even made a band shirt out of the Coors Light logo. "You see, Fight is in the Coors font and Paris is in the Light font, like their logo, but its our name!" Riveting. It was around this point I looked at Jay and saw the glossed over bored look in his eyes too, and he nodded at me. It was time to liven up this party. "Who wants to do shots?" Of course everybody said yeah, because if you didn't know by now, they party. I had a handle of Captain Morgan for reasons unknown to me, so we pour out the shots for everyone, and I take the bottle since we ran our of shot glasses. We do the standard cheers, they take their shots and I take a drink from the bottle. And I keep drinking, and keep drinking, and keep drinking. Everyone looks on in horror as I chug the rest of the bottle of Captain Morgan Spiced Rum. Why did I do this? No idea, I was 19 years old, one month away from 20. Logic wasn't exactly my strong suite.

I woke up the next morning at around 9 or 10. Head pounding. Eyes blurry. I was a good 3 or 4 hours late for work, so I grabbed my phone and called in sick (the only time I have ever done that!) I had the urgent need to puke and pee, hopefully not at the same time, so I headed to the bathroom as fast as I could. Something looked strange as I ran through the hallway, but I didn't have time to check it out because as soon as I crossed the threshold into the bathroom I started spewing. When I was finished, I headed back to check out the damage. There was no sign of the band, there were beer cans everywhere, and the empty bottle of Captain Morgan was in the grass downstairs. OK. I headed back to my room to see what had caught my eye earlier, there were red hand prints all over the hallway walls. It looked like a scene from a zombie movie. Fuck it, I didn't have time to worry about that right then, so I went back and laid down. Only something was off. Everything was sticky. And red. I ran back to the bathroom and looked in the mirror to see I was completely covered in fake blood and sharpie. Then my phone rang. It was work, I absolutely had to come in because I had an appointment that day to get my brakes fixed by our mechanic. Fuck.

I had a few flashes of what happened the night before and the rest I pieced together from stories. It started out on the patio smoking cigarettes. Our down stairs neighbor (I believe his name either was, or we just called him Ed for some reason) came out to do his nightly ritual of coughing really loud while smoking and creeping in the parking lot. Apparently I had enough because I just screamed at him to shut the fuck and go away and threw the empty Captain Morgan bottle at him because I still had it in my hand for some reason. It must have been around that time the band told me to calm down because apparently I yelled at them (and Jay still quotes this to this day) "Or what? Is Fight Paris going to have to Fight Kevin?" Look, I had almost a gallon of disgusting Captain Morgan slowly shutting down my brain, wasn't exactly on my A game. I have no idea how long I stayed on my feet, but I did briefly unblackout to everyone in my room and I was talking to the guy with dreadlocks about shitty tattoos (I had just gotten my first tattoo like a week before, just the outline of the heart on my wrist, and half of it fell out, so I was kind of regretting it) when he pulled up his shirt and showed me his Korn logo tramp stamp, and I realized, maybe it wasn't so bad. Then nothing. Apparently Jay had to hold my dick so I could piss all over everything in the bathroom (thanks Jay!) and then I finally passed the fuck out. It was about this time the band decided to sign me, and found a bottle of fake blood in my room (don't know why it was there) and emptied it all over me*.

Lesson learned: Know about a band before you let them stay at your house, or you might succumb to alcohol poisoning or worse, absolute boredom.

After I finally got around to listening to this bands album, I realized even then in the midst of my darkest days musically, that they fucking sucked. Both as people and musicians. Seriously, that album was fucking terrible. I think a few years later the band broke up, only to fade away into absolute obscurity. Thank fucking Jesus.


*About 6 years after the fake blood incident, I bought a new mattress, and when they came to take my old one away, had a fucking blast explaining the giant human shaped blood stain. In all fairness though, I'm pretty sure the sketchy mattress people didn't even fucking care.

In Dog Years, We Are All Dead

Western Settings - Caskitt - The Bertos (3/12/15 @ Tower Bar, San Diego CA)

I'm not going to spend a lot of time "reviewing" the music portion of this show (Because you know, I normally totally do). It's Caskitt and Western Settings, if you can't figure it out by now, well I feel bad for you son. I got 99 problems but shitty punk ain't one (that was weird. I'm so very tired)

I have several life adventures coming up that is going to require a bit of money to be saved (see you soon Seattle, Portland, San Francisco and Las Vegas) , but it seems every time I go into money saving lockdown mode, I immediately just start spending more money like an asshole. This time I decided to fuel a 3 day work-drink-work cycle that I am super not regretting this morning. You see, I work at 6:30am Monday through Friday, and I'm getting old. I'm definitely not a math wizard or numerologist, but I believe that: (late nights)(old age) + Booze/waking up early = weird shits and angry mornings. Feel free to check my work on that, that new common core math is confusing. Needless to say, even after 2 cycles of work-drink-work, I was already drained. But when a human as lovely as Justine has a birthday party show, you suck that shit up and cruise it. Plus I recently rediscovered taking naps in my car during my lunch break. Sweaty sweaty naps.

But its only Thursday!: an adventure in 4 parts

Part 1: Whiskey

I picked up my friends Kenny and Rich and we headed to North Park. We decided to go a little early, because honestly, why the fuck not? The only problem was, we didn't really have an end game plan. But like all the best things, the decision was made last minute on the fly. Rich looked up "bars" on his computer phone, and the closest one was a little place called Tiger Tiger. We decided to do a drive by check out to make sure it would suit our needs, but upon further investigation, the place looked a little out of our price range. Which is the nice way to say it looked fancy as fuck and we poor. So we went with plan B, which was a place called Seven Grand. The selling point was it is a whiskey bar, which pretty much spoke to my soul. Everyone knows parking in North Park is fucking bullshit, so after circling the block, we finally found a prime spot 4 or 5 blocks away in front of an AA meeting place. Oh, the irony (or at the very least Canadian irony). We walk into this whiskey bar, and holy fuck. It was dark, freezing, and the bartenders wore vests and bow ties. But alas, behind the bar, behold! At least 300 different kinds of whiskey! Did I get beaten to death by the police and somehow sneak into heaven? My white skin and lack of stealth abilities says no, this is real life. We all took a seat at the bar, and pondered if this was the meaning of life. Kenny and Rich both got whiskey sours, which somehow came out looking creamy (or frothy?) and fucking delicious. Normally I like to drink whiskey 7's, but in an establishment such as this, you can't drink that piece of shit, so I went with an Old Fashioned. Probably one of my better decisions I have ever made. That was a tasty beverage. We slow sipped our fancy dranks like the piece of shit posers we are, and then it was unfortunatley time to move on.

I should know sir, I've always been here

Part 2: Foooooooooood

We left the place I will probably someday drink myself to death in, and ventured off to find food. Again, we didn't really have a plan except to "walk that way until we see something." Sushi, sushi, vegan sushi, PIZZA! Duh. We wandered into Berkeley pizza and grabbed a couple slices and a beer. Now don't get me wrong, this place was no Luigi's, but it was still pretty damn good. The slices were deep dish style, so while they lacked overall size, they more than made up for it in depth. Which made them dangerous. You look at it like, "oh that slice isn't that big, I could easily pound a whole extra large pizza by myself." That would be a mistake you fat piece of shit. I was hurting after 2 slices. A Peperoni and a Pesto Garlic, both very delicious and very filling. Thank god we had a hike back to the car, because I had to seriously walk it off.

Part 3: X Gunna Give It To You

Around this point we started to grow weary of fancy things and wanted to venture back into our more familiar "seedy" scene. So off to Live Wire we went. I'm not going to lie, I was a little jealous of Kenny and Rich's Whiskey Sour from earlier, so I decided to get one here, make it a double. Well, the thing about that is a fancy whiskey bar will put some time and effort and love into making said drink. A dive bar puts only hatred into it, which amounted to whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiskey and sour mix tossed into a pint glass. Which I personally love, but I'll admit was a little disappointing after seeing how the 1% drink theirs. We met our friend Ly Yen and had some in depth conversations about shitty movie remakes, Punk Rock Bowling, and how DMX, Ja Rule and Mystikal all need to make comebacks, preferably together as one yelling, gruff voiced super group. Also I learned DMX sang Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer once, which is absolutely as ridiculous as it sounds.

 

Part 4: The Show

 Ah, the reason we all went out in the first place. We headed east to the Tower Bar a little later then expected, but shocking! It was OK. The show hadn't even started yet because the guest of honor hadn't yet arrived. Once Justineysomeany arrived, the party started. First up were The Bertos, or the only band I hadn't ever seen play. They consisted of that guy I've seen working at Luigi's on guitar, Ricky the bass player on drums, and Davey Tiltwheel "Mikey Erging" on bass and drunk rambling about ketchup and stuff. They played short fast typical pop punk songs and were super rad. Definitely check them out, they totally made my list of bands to investigate further. Caskitt played next and were awesome as always. They even covered AFI's "Days of the Phoenix". Stoked. Finally Western Settings played and I once again found myself outside. Seriously, what the fuck? Every time. Its becoming a real problem. I righted that wrong, and went back inside to watch them, because they seriously fucking rule. After making the bar sing Justine happy birthday, they finished the night off with "Kicking and Screaming" and everything was right in the world.

Western Settings, now with 25% more Japanese robots!

Epilogue: Don't Let Go, You've Got the Music In You

Fuck, waking up this morning blew. The only thing that got me out of bed was the fact that it was burrito Friday at work. But I mean, in the end its all fucking worth it. I made a decision a while ago that I will not let work dictate my life. I mean, I'll complain about it all day long, but fuck it. You only YOLO once. Am I a worthless piece of shit today? Yeah. Did I write a blog entry when I should have been working? Also, yeah, but its Friday, who gives a shit. And it could always be worse, at least...I'm not fucking dead... nailed it.

 

Pomona and Las Vegas, get your shit together you have Western Settings, Gentlemen Prefer Blood and the almighty DFMK coming your way. Get into it.



Farmers can go suck a lemon

The Shell Corporation - Western Settings - Gentlemen Prefer Blood - Dead Dads (3/7/15 @ Tower Bar, San Diego CA)

Seriously, Daylights saving time can go fuck itself. Yeah great, the sun stays up until 9pm now and I guess I can go play outside or whatever. Why do we do this? I think it has to do with farmers or some shit, but that could totally be one of those things you think is true, but has been a lie your entire life. Like true happiness or you'll catch a cold if you don't bring a jacket. And I mean, do farmers really need an extra hour of daylight when they are just pumping human growth hormones and HPV into all your fruits and meats? Oh, you only eat free range, organically grown tomatoes from a farm of sunshine and happiness and that bullshit Daiya cheese? Good for you, go fuck yourself too. Have fun living a month or 2 longer than me, I'll be over here enjoying my gas station corndogs and carcinogens. What I'm trying to say is this time change fucks with my sleeping schedule, and I absolutely do not have time for that. This is the only nice thing you will EVER hear me say about Arizona, those racist desert turds are smart for skipping this shit. But they can still go kick rocks. Because that's all they got there. Rocks. As far as the eye can see.

But I'm not here to talk shit about Arizona or Father Time. I'm here to talk shit on the "bands" I was "lucky" enough to catch this weekend. Lets get into it.

Friday I was supposed to go up to LA to the Redwood to catch Shell Corp, Bad Cop and the Bombpops, but unfortunately that didn't pan out. By the time everyone who was supposed to go finally met up, it was 9pm, and a 2 hour drive north just didn't seem like it was worth it. Plus, I'm pretty sure I saw this exact same show last August maybe, and all these bands will play again, so it wasn't the worst thing in the world. We opted to get drunk instead. Duh.

Saturday morning I had 2 options. 1) Get up and head down to North Park to catch the singers of Cheap Girls, Hard Girls and Fake Problems play an acoustic show at a brand new record store, or 2) Stay in bed and watch the new Netflix series The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. Please. If you were a fan of 30 Rock, you will probably like UKS. It is written by Tina Fey and was intended to be on NBC, so it has the same look and feel of 30 Rock. The premise is basic, Erin from the Office gets abducted by a cult as a kid, lives in an underground bunker for 15 years, and then gets rescued and has to adapt to life above ground. She moves in with a gay Tracy Jordan and works for Jenna Malone. That's the way it seems at least before it finally feels like its own show about 3 or 4 episodes in. I don't want to spoil anything but the Werewolf bit, The Reverend and who plays him (including solving what the mystery crank does!), and the back story for Mrs. Voorhees are all gold. I highly suggest checking out this show, and giving it a few episodes to warm up.

Around 7pm, it was time for me to leave my cave of shame and head over to Rich's house. Because if you can't tell by now, pizza and beers are a must before a show (Pizza and beers is a must before anything really). I got over to his house in time to catch the tail end of Jared (Sic Waiting, Dead Frets) hyping up Del Taco to Jan (The Shell Corporation) as Jared normally does. Seriously, ask Jared about Del Taco and prepare to discuss it for hours. He was also really excited about these miracle brain pills that make you concentrate or whatever. "And who doesn't want to be Bradley Cooper?" I tuned it out. Eventually we got our shit together and headed down to Luigi's and got our pizza party on.

Dead Dads

These guys and gal are a band from up in Sacramenty. I feel like I'm always kind of repeating myself, but I have heard good things. They totally didn't disappoint. Kind of bummed I got there about half way through their set and only caught the tail end, but what I did hear made me download their old album this morning and I'm probably defiantly going to pick up their new album that just came out last month soon. It's fucking called Space Camp. How could I not? These guys totally made my check out the next time you have a chance for sure list. Because that's a thing.

Gentlemen Prefer Blood

I have this band on my iPod and I know I have seen them before, but for some reason I always thought they were a different band. I think I made up a band in my head that's part Dudes Night and part Horror Squad. No Idea why. Anywho, the real GPB, they were pretty good.

SURPRISE!

Caskitt played a short surprise set. 5 songs and the Friends theme cover. I am a little bummed because Matt said they covered an AFI song the night before at VLHS, but they didn't end up playing it this night. Dumb, but I guess I'll survive. Go preorder their new album, This Machine Kills Sadness. Shits tight. Midwest Summer Nights is the jam.

Western Set

 

Yes It Is

 

You're welcome

The Shell Corporation

I am a newer Shell Corporation fan. I think the first time I heard them was in the middle of last year and they blew me away. Since then, I have refused to not see them play when they are near (except, you know, Friday night). This night was the most fun I have had seeing them so far. At this point in the night, I had been drinking just enough to accept Jared when he grabbed me and to scream along to every word. Seriously, if The Shell Corporation is in your town, go see them. They are crazy good live.

The Jerk

 

 

All in all, a pretty decent night. Good bands. Good friends. Good pizza. Good beer. The four horsemen of a good time. Herding drunk Jared home was also fun. The best was Rich luring him out of his car with promises of Sour Patch Kids. White people, am I right?!?

 

Get out and support your local music scene you piece of shit.

You're out of your element Donny

"Were you listening to The Dude's story? So you have no frame of reference here, Donny. You're like a child who wanders into the middle of a movie"

-Walter Shobchak

Lucky you! Today is the daily double, 2 show reviews for the price of 1!

Guttermouth - Counterpunch - Caskitt- Castoff (2/20/15 @ Soda Bar, San Diego CA)

Tonight's theme brought to you by Nostalgia and Fish Tacos.

I was super supposed to go up to Hollywood on Friday for the 9th annual Dre Day celebration show. But by the time I got off work, I just didn't feel like driving up there. My teeth decided to start acting like little pieces of shit, and I was getting tattooed on Saturday, so I had a pretty good excuse for not going. Instead I decided to keep it "local" and head down to San Diego to catch this show.

I also decided at this show that I was going to start taking notes, just to get my general in the moment impressions of everything, and because I think my immediate reactions to stuff is way better than my post reflection. Also, I'm totes super profesh now :P





Pre Show Pizza Party!

 

 

After the required preshow pizza and beers, we headed to the Soda Bar. This is something I have always noticed when a punk band who was "big" in the late 90's/early 2000's plays in San Diego, it always attracts the worst fucking people. Lots of goatees, plaid shorts, long socks, neck tattoos, baseball hats and DC and Volcom gear. The type of people who if they said after the show they were immediately heading to the desert to pound Budweisers and ride quads, you wouldn't be that surprised. The type of people where at any second a fight can break out. I mean, the Soda Bar isn't exactly the biggest place in the world, and there was a lot of people packed in there, I grabbed a beer at the bar and was heading towards the stage, and I was trying to get by this dude who was literally standing there flexing on purpose so I couldn't get past him. I mean actual flexing. It was fucking weird. I am a huge fan of 90's skate punk, it is what got me into the punk scene, but god damn it if I don't hate the bro's.

Castoff

I didn't know who Castoff was prior to this show. I guess they took a long time off, and recently got a new drummer and bass player. The only thing I could think while they were playing was they sound exactly like 90's skate punk. If you think about Bad Religion, Pennywise, Strung Out, or any band like that, but you don't think of a specific song, they were that. I heard a few of the key words in their songs, words like unity, authority, and time. Total 90's Core.

Warped Tour Rating: 1998.

 

I would like to point out at this time that this guy standing next to me was playing Candy Crush on his phone the entire time.

Caskitt

Look, I have already told you Caskitt is rad, so I don't feel like I have to tell you they killed again. Just, shut up and preorder their new album This Machine Kills Sadness March 10th. It comes out March 31st on Compact Disc and digitally. Notes from my notes: "Did they just cover the Friends theme song? Yes, yes they did"

Warped Tour Rating: Staying home and watching Netflix instead

Counterpunch

The trip down memory lane continues! If Castoff was High School, Counterpunch would be my early 20's. Totally have what sounded like the Drive Thru Records sound. Very melodic with some screaming. I could honestly only listen to like 3 songs before I had to go out and smoke a cigarette. I actively try and forget this musical period in my life, so being confronted with my past, I wanted non of it.

Warped Tour Rating: 2006.

 

 

That motherfucker is still playing Candy Crush.

Guttermouth

Oh boy. So a few years ago I saw Guttermouth play at Rookies Sports Bar (weird, I know) here in Oceanside. It was the worst fucking show I have ever seen. Mark, the singer, was so drunk, stumbling about, falling off stage, forgetting lyrics, and at one point just left the stage, assigning a random audience member to take his place. It was terrible. And not terrible in a Skiba beautiful disaster kind of way, but terrible in a I don't ever want to pay to see Guttermouth play again kind of way. But here I was (way to follow through with your convictions Kevin). So when Mark stumbled by with his puka shell necklace, reeking of weed and booze, I was ready for a repeat. Luckily, Kenny wanted to bail and Ricky knew of a place in Encinitas that has dollar fish tacos which fucking ruled.

Warped Tour Rating: Fish Tacos > Guttermouth

 

 

Mac Sabbath - Black Fag (The Hideout, San Diego CA)

I woke up Saturday pumped. It was finally time to get legit tattooed. It's been a while since I got a real tattoo, and I had an appointment with who I consider the best tattoo artist in San Diego, Jasmine Wright (jasminewrightisyourfriend.com). After a few hours of pain, I walked away with actual art etched in my skin forever.

 

cool star bro

 

After getting stabbed a bunch, I headed to North Park to wait for the posse to show up. I was going to get pizza again, but I found myself in Live Wire instead drinking a beer. Pliny the Elder actually. I heard good things, and it didn't disappoint. Then #2 came and went. Then number #3. By the time I started on #4, our misfit Avengers assembled and it was time to go watch check out some themed cover bands!



Black Fag

Parking in North Park at these bars is fucking hard. By the time we parked and regrouped and got in, we pretty much missed the band. Caught the last few songs, and from what I could hear, it sounded like it would have been a good time. I will totally try and catch these guys for real next time I have the chance.

Mac Sabbath

McDonalds themed Black Sabbath cover band. These are the words that sold me on going to this show. Unfortunately, the place was so fucking crowded I couldn't get anywhere near the front to try and watch this band. Plus I was pretty drunk at this point, so without the visual aid, and the fact that it was so loud from people talking in the back of the bar, there was no way I could even think about paying attention. Plus the place was getting pretty smoky from the fog machine, and my new tattoo was starting to burn, so I spent most of the time hanging out outside. I did eventually make it back in, and it cleared out enough to be able to catch the last song they played, which was actually kind of cool. Sounded a lot like Sabbath. The singer was dressed like Ronald, the drummer was the Hamburglar, and the bass player and guitarist was the Grimace and Mayor McCheese. Except fucked up metal versions of all these characters. Everybody who did see them seemed to enjoy it, so there's that.

couldn't make this up if I tried

 

 

Was super pumped on the Denny's after party though. Eggs, bacon and Mashed Potatoes. Shit ruled.  

 

So yeah, that's it. Didn't like stuff, missed stuff, got tattooed, got drunk and ate some potatoes. Story of my fucking life. Had fun though, and in the end, isn't that all that really matters?

 

Until next time turds, I think I have a week off of shows, then its Shell Corporation super fun party weekend!

 

Burritos and Pancakes

Will's Birthday Show: Ash Williams - Weekender - Sic Waiting - Western Settings - Shinjoku Riot/No Talent (2/13/15 @ Til-Two Club, San Diego CA)

Oh, hello there! I didn't see you come in. It's been a few weeks since I have graced the music scene with my presence, but here we are, back in the saddle. Kevin rides again. Whatever.

Hard

This Friday just so happened to be on the 13th. So as is tradition, after 9 soul crushing hours of working, I ventured off to a tattoo shop to grab one of those quick $13 tattoos. Excitedly, I rushed to San Marcos, ran into the shop to sign in, and sat down on the world's most inappropriate and extremely uncomfortable waiting room "chair" that has ever existed (This tattoo shop is super hip, so fashion over functionality, you know?) Have you ever gone somewhere and walked in and just felt like you shouldn't be there? I'm looking around at all the people in the room, and I realize I'm the oldest person here by at least 8 years, I'm still rocking work clothes, and I'm the only guy. These are the types of situations most dudes would fantasize about, but in real life, fuck that, I'm surrounded by annoying children was my only thought (I'm aging very nicely into my personality). Thankfully I overheard that the wait was about 3 hours, so I packed it up and bailed before I had to explain to Chris Hansen why I was there.

The second obstacle to getting to the show was my softball game. Yes, I play adult co-ed slow pitch softball. It's fun, sue me. Our team is The Parking Lot Drinkers, a name we have earned. This weeks game was against our bitter rivals, and old team mates The Velocibatters. We totally fucking lost. But we had fun doing it!*

Two disappointments down, it was time to head down to San Diego to watch some bands!

Shinjoku Riot/No Talent

Only half of both of these bands from Mexico showed up, so instead of letting the people down and canceling their appearance, they did the quick math and realized half a band plus half a band equals a whole band! One mega Tijuana band. Which I completely missed. Traffic down there was a bitch, even at 9 at night. I blame the stupid fake love holiday.

Western Settings

Almost every time these guys play, for whatever reason I just don't watch them. I have no idea why. Maybe its because I know them. Maybe its because I know I'll be able to see them play again. Maybe it was the evolution of Ricky's rat tail to full blown mullet. Whatever the reason, I decided tonight I was going to not only watch them, but actually pay attention, no matter what. It was Will's birthday after all! But after half a song I found myself involuntarily outside smoking a cigarette. Like they play and I just get teleported elsewhere. Luckily some naggy blonde a dear friend was there to remind me I couldn't write about the show if I didn't watch the show. So I ventured back in and forced myself to stay, like a dog, with promises of treats (beer).

I'll be the first to admit when I'm wrong. Most of the time. Sometimes. Maybe. If I'm drunk. What I'm trying to say is, yes I am dumb for not really paying attention to these guys. I'm sorry. The whole band plays with this energy, almost like they enjoy playing music! Audible gasp! Weird right? Tonight was no different, very solid, very good. About halfway through, Ricky had us sing Will happy birthday, which is normally cliché and dumb, but when you have a room of about 75 friends singing to another friend, its actually kind of cool. Another point of interest, is during the last song, they were joined by Kevin White, formerly of Caskitt, currently of living in Florida, who apparently hopped on a plane and flew in to hang out.

I'm an idiot, this is a known fact. It always takes a while for a band I eventually end up liking to actually click in my brain. I have seen Western Settings play a ton of times, I have their old EP on my iPod, I have even streamed their new full length that's coming. I've liked this band, but I've kept them at arms length. This show has made me finally want to fully embrace Western Settings in nice big warm awkward holding it for too long hug.

Disappointed Will wasn't wearing a party hat

Sic Waiting

I'm not going to lie, I mostly wanted to watch Jared and company because Jared has a broken foot, and I thought seeing him hobble around on stage in a cast would make me feel better about myself. And it totally did. In spite of that, I think WS left some of their energy on the stage, because this is probably the best I have seen Sic Waiting play yet. Jason broke a bass string he was rocking so hard. A bass string! Those fuckers are thick. Very well done. I was thoroughly impressed with the San Diego music scene that night.

 

Nice cast bro.

 

 

I wanted to watch Weekender, I have heard really good things about them, but unfortunately the night kind of devolved into a drunken shit show. So while I didn't watch Weekender or Ash Williams, I did smoke an entire pack of cigarettes, took shots of what tastes like Listerine, and watched part of Beverly Hills Cop II on mute. Kenny was really hammered, and wouldn't shut up about breakfast foods. Particularly pancakes and breakfast pizza. I have one note in my phone that Jess had me take:

 

Life's weird man, like we are hear now and tomorrow we're like, "I just want to eat some pancakes" (makes pancake eating motion), and then we are back at work"

-Kenny

 

So that pretty much sums up where the night went. Which don't get me wrong, I absolutely love. I had a blast. Good night, good music, good friends. Party.

 

Next weekend should be a good one. Friday is Dre day in Hollywood, which is a celebration of Dr. Dre's birthday with a bunch of bands playing and covering Dre produced songs, and games and shit in-between. And Saturday is Mac Sabbath, a Black Sabbath / McDonalds cover band. Look them up. Please.

 

*that's a lie. Losing is never fun. fact. Win or die.