Friday, November 13, 2015

Pete Gainesville: Fest Weekend Part 2

The Fest 14 (10/30/15-11/2/15, Gainesville FL)

Fuck Christmas, Fest really is the most wonderful time of the year. Friends past, present, and future gather in an unassuming Florida college town and rage non-stop for 3 days. My first Fest was last year, and while I had a lot of fun, I knew I could do better. After going hard for 2 days at Pre-Fest, it was time to head north for the main event.

The following is an account of the last 3 days.

Day 3

Friday morning saw me board the Pork Chop Express bound for Gainesville. Lucky for me I was dead tired still and basically teleported the entire 2 hours (aka I napped, duh). I was staying at The Holiday Inn and sharing my room with Sic Waiting AND D-Cent Jerks, so I knew check in was going to be process. Luckily I got there a little before everyone else and had time to run up to the room and take a shower and shit. I felt brand new. We got everyone checked in and I ran down the street to Mother's Pub for my first dose of Fest punk Rock. OC45 were already playing, and I still have no idea what they sound like. You see the PA decided to stop working and the place was tiny, so all I could really hear were drums and guitar. Thankfully they fixed it before Dead Bars played and I watched them for the second time in 24 hours. I had a good 2 hours to kill, so I ran back to the hotel and took another nap because I'm old and didn't want to get cranky.

Dead Bars, again

After basically laying in a bed for an hour, I headed down to Durty Nelly's. Last year at Fest, I had to wait in a line to get into just about every show I wanted to see. This year, not so much. I got into every venue pretty quick. So I got there a little early and saw a French band called Powernap. Fitting. Dollar Signs played next and were one of my "can't miss bands." Kendra met back up with me before their set, and after we headed to Loosey's to once again see fucking Dead Bars. After that I went to High Dive to meet up with my buddy Ricky and Caskitt and Dudes Night, and I thought to see Cayetana, but it was World's Scariest Police Chases. We ended up just hanging out outside anyways, and I eventually drank someone's spilled beer off the disgusting table because trash lyfe. 

Dollar Signs
I think I have a problem. Dead Bars 
Trash! Trash! Trash!

Direct Hit! was the next band on my list to see, so I headed for Boca Fiesta. I ran into Kendra, Jordan, and Alena and was immediately told about the disgusting drink they were offering. They took an Apple Cider, cut a hole in the top of the can, and shoved a mini bottle of Fireball in it. It was terrible. I finished mine and Kendra's. Direct Hit! hit a snag in the middle of their set when a lady got her leg caught between the stage and the crowd and popped her knee out of it's socket. Everyone was cool about it, and the massive crowd parted like the Red Sea so EMT's could come in and do their thing. They ended up finishing their set and Nick Woods was out to go become a father (Congrats!)

Direct Hit!

I found myself inside Cowboy's watching Off With Their Heads next. I saw the buddies in Success leaving towards the end and ended up going with them to Flaco's to get a burrito. I also ran back into Kendra again who was also getting a burrito and heading back to the Holiday Inn to meet up with some friends. The room party got moved to outside where we drank Malort until it was time to just give up on life and go the fuck to sleep. I went back to my hotel room which was packed full of people, found myself a nice little corner, and fell asleep...

Day 4

...Until I woke up at 8 am to pee. I was gone 1 minute. 60 fucking seconds. And came back and my spot was taken. OK fine. I had stuff to do anyway. I needed to dye my beard black for my Halloween costume. Turns out, black food coloring is green? I don't what the fuck happened, but it was all wrong. Freaking out a little, I googled the nearest CVS which was a cool 3 mile walk down the road. Thankfully they had temporary black hair dye and my Tim Timebomb costume was a go.

Yea, yea, yea

I hopped in an Uber with Jared and we headed down to Loosey's for Jason Guy Smiley's Pineapple Party. The annual Pineapple Party has grown in size over the years, and this was the biggest yet. A little too big. Kendra showed up and instead of fighting to get in, we just decided to go to Boca Fiesta to get some food. I was told I HAD to try the Gator Burrito, which was OK. Gator really does taste exactly like chicken. Rubbery, rubbery chicken. We still had some time to kill, so we headed for Anthem Tattoo to get our flip-flop tattoo we had been talking about for 3 or 4 months. We could hear Bad Cop/Bad Cop sound checking at Lot 10, so that was cool. 
Oh yeah, Kendra was a Lisa Frank Unicorn. Duh. 

I missed Devon Kay and the Solutions getting tattooed, but I had time to run to High Dive to see Success. Then it was off to The Midnight to see John from Dead Bars and Nato Coles soothe our shitty souls with acoustic music. We had the brilliant idea since I was dressed as Tim Armstrong to head back across town to see Kill Lincoln's Rancid cover set, but shockingly, the place was at capacity and we were never getting in, so we went to Mother's Pub for a drink instead. Now, they plan Fest weekend every year around the Florida Gators going up to Georgia to play football so all the college kids and bro's are gone. That doesn't mean they all go though. We walked into Mother's and it was 35 TV's playing the game and the place was packed with Gator fans. We might have stuck out a little. But a double whiskey ginger was only $3 so fuck 'em.

Success
John (Dead Bars)
Fuck 'Em All

We hustled back down to Loosey's for a few Dudes Night jams, then over to Rockey's for Too Many Daves, then BACK to Loosey's for Caskitt's awesome set, then to Tall Paul's to see Jabber cover Josie and the Pussycats, then to Durty Nelly's for Sic Waiting. Whew. I think that was the most music I watched in a row all weekend. I rewarded myself with a burrito from Flaco's

Caskitt
Sic Waiting...Kinda

Back to Rockey's I went to after to see the homies Western Settings. I was going to go see The Creeps again after, but instead was sent on a mission to buy wine in anticipation for the Holiday Inn Lobby Acoustic Show that was happening later. And also to go to the hotel room to wash the black out of my beard (Sorry maids, that tub ring was black hair dye, not my filth! OK, so maybe a little filth). I ran into John from Dead Bars again, and he said he was playing in a hotel room, so I followed him to go watch. Then ran down to the lobby to see Dollar Signs, Devin Kay (Dressed as pizza), and Jared play some more acoustic tunes. I was dreading trying to sleep in my overstuffed room, so I hitched a ride to the Paramount with Kendra in some random guy's car to stay in her friends room and see what the pool party was all about. It was mostly Ricky being hammered, Jason Guy Smiley and friends playing Fat band covers, Dylan and Josh swimming, and mosquito bites. So many fucking mosquito bites. Oh, and I was freaking out because I lost my phone. Eventually I turned my OWTH shirt into a pillow and fell asleep.

Western Settings
Dead Bars Hotel Room Acoustic
Dollar Signs Acoustic
Devon Kay

Day 5

Holy Fuck. Last day. OK. You can do this. I woke up at the Paramount pretty early and hopped a shuttle back to the Holiday Inn to find my fucking phone. No way was I going to be able to make it without it. Luckily for me, the guy who drove us to the Paramount had a pretty unmistakable car, and my phone was sitting right on the passenger seat still. I got the front desk to call him, and his buddy came down and got it for me. HERO! Back in action, I met Ricky and Jared at the hotel bar for Bloody Mary's and fries. Kendra eventually showed up and we headed down to Cowboy's to watch Crusades. Western Settings was out on the hunt for mimosa's, and we decided that was a good idea. Unfortunately we couldn't find shit, so we went to The Midnight for some delicious Strawberry Ciders. Jan from The Shell Corporation was playing acoustic up the street, so we watched him, then headed straight back to The Midnight so I could try the Sweet Potato Casserole Strong Ale I noticed they had earlier. Sounds gross, but it was fucking amazing.

Jan

Our For The Love of Punk boss Johnny was playing at The Wooly in The Gamits, so we went there to avoid being labeled "shitty employees." I was heading for the corner liquor store to buy cigarettes when Ricky from Western Settings grabbed me and I followed him to a hotel room to shotgun a couple beers shirtless with about 10 other dudes for the FTLP Instagram. After I went back to the store again and got my cigarettes, I headed for the Palomino to watch City Mouse slay, then to Rockey's for D-Cent Jerks. I was heading to Dirty Nelly's to see Two Cow Garage when I ran into Stacey Dee from Bad Cop and ended up hanging out in the street talking to her instead. Eventually I made it to Durty Nelly's to see what I thought was going to be Arliss Nancy, but was Black List Royals, so I left to Boca Fiesta to find Kendra and watch the last few songs of Jabber. She was with Jan, and we went and tried to get into to see Arliss Nancy. but there was a line, so we ate Flaco's instead. 

The Gamits
City Mouse
D-Cent Jerks

After my 3rd Flaco's burrito for the weekend, we headed back to Loosey's. France's Guerilla Poubelle were playing, followed by the last band of the weekend, FUCK! (It's Pronounced Shit!). After we said our goodbye's to people, we took our last walk to the Holiday Inn for the pain in the ass to get into After Party, took a couple of photo booth pictures, wandered around for a while, then went to Ricky's empty room to pass the fuck out. 

FUCK! (It's Pronounced Shit!)
My Whole Crews Ugly

The next day I woke up, packed, and slept on all the transportation's home. The Marathon was over, and although I lost control of my body at the finish line, managed to crawl across. 

And that was that, I took a couple days off work to see if I was going to come down with the FestAIDS, but it never happened. Thank god. That shit sucks. But, Fest weekend is the best weekend, and after 2 years of going, I am super excited to use my knowledge to take it to the next level at Fest 15.

This weekend should be interesting:
Friday November 13th: Swinging Utters, Success, The Bombpops, Beach Slang @ The Hideout (San Diego)
Saturday November 14th: Modern Baseball, Jeff Rosenstock, Pup, Tiny Moving Parts @ The Lampost (San Diego)
Sunday
Sunday November 15th: Lagwagon, PEARS, Runaway Kid @ The Troubador (L.A.)

Go support your scene, c u in da pit.

Monday, November 9, 2015

Bob Tampa: Fest Weekend Part 1

Big Pre-Fest in Little Ybor 3 (10/28/15-10/29/15, Ybor FL)

Fuck Christmas, Fest really is the most wonderful time of the year. Friends past, present, and future gather in an unassuming Florida college town and rage non-stop for 3 days. My first Fest was last year, and while I had a lot of fun, I knew I could do better. That's why this year I decided to head to Tampa early and see what Pre-Fest was all about.

The following is an account of those first 2 days.

Day 1

Kaylin, the sweetheart, was nice enough to get me to the airport at 5am so I could fly off and have fun without her, god bless her. So after traveling all day on an airplane and a quick cab ride to the hotel, I was checked in, registered and ready to party. I figured out where New World Brewery and hustled down the street to meet up with my party partner for the weekend Kendra, Denver friend Nik, and their crew of Australians who were already there. Guerilla Poubelle, a french band. were already playing. I was handed my first PBR and the weekend officially began. We watched a little of The Priceduifkes before heading across the street to a little bar that had these vodka cherry drinks that the Australians with us described as tasting like "Play-Doh." After a few of those we strolled on down to Tequila's for some food and more music. There I caught Too Many Daves, Hospital Job, Crusades, and eventually Mean Jeans while somewhere in between eating the grossest burrito I have ever had. It was a standard chicken burrito, but I didn't understand my decision when the lady asked me if I wanted Verde sauce or cheese on top. Apparently Tampa cheese has the consistency of marshmallow fluff and comes in a can. At some point I wandered down to The Orpheum to catch some of The Menzingers and buy their album On The Impossible Past on vinyl, but was called back to Tequila's because the homies Bad Cop/Bad Cop were there hanging out. After catching up with those lovely ladies and having a few hard ciders, it was back to the hotel for rest. I was lulled off to sleep by the sound of Nat Geo's investigation into transgendered people and Kendra reading me Kimberly Strubell Facebook statuses. #status

Just...No
Look, I didn't take a lot of pictures the first day

Day 2

I woke up semi-well rested and tangled up in my "sheep feather" blanket. I took the weirdest shit of my life, and headed down to the hotel lobby to see if they had a continental breakfast, I was craving a waffle. They did, but you needed some card they gave you which I didn't have. The lady was nice enough to let me make a waffle anyway, so I walked over to the waffle batter and immediately broke everything. Waffle goo started getting everywhere like a terrible sitcom until I shoved the plug thing back in. The nice lady came over, heavily sighed, told me to go wash my hands, and she would make me a waffle. 
After eating my waffle of shame, Kendra and I headed out to go get freezy drinks at a local bar since we had a few hours to kill before the first band we wanted to see. The freezy drink bar is one of those places that has different drinks in what looks like an Icee machine that the bartender then adds more booze too. Well, me being the human garbage I am, decided on a "Suicide," or as they called it, a "tour bus," or as I called it, a "trash juice." It was surprisingly good! The flavors didn't melt into a mish-mash of indiscernible grossness, that or the 151 shot did its job. Whatever. We told each other tales of Pete Gainesville and his boss Bob Tampa until it was time to head back to Tequila's.


Back at Tequila's Kepi Ghoulie and Chris Farren played acoustic sets while I carried around a pumpkin we dubbed "Gourdey." I also finally got to do one of the "Why I Fest" pictures that I am looking forward to seeing. After that we made our way to an arcade bar we saw earlier to get in a few games of Skeeball since Kendra is a "professional Skeeballer" and needed to make sure she didn't get rusty. We won enough tickets to get a couple of kick-ass skull rings and some temporary tattoos and then it was back to watching music.

Gourdey

We once again made our way back to Tequila's to catch Nato Coles and the Blue Diamond Band, who was followed by the mighty PEARS. We left PEARS a little early to head back across town to New World Brewery to see Dead Bars, then I dipped back to The Orpheum for Banner Pilot. I was a little drunk at this point and bummed when I showed up at The Orpheum and saw a line, of course one of the bands I was dying to see would have a long ass line. Then I realized the doors didn't open until 6, and it was only 5:50. Idiot. The place was surprisingly empty when I got in, but filled up pretty decently by the time Banner Pilot started playing. I caught a couple of songs from Off With Their Heads before I headed back to the freezy bar to meet up with Kendra and get some food. I really wanted french fries, and when I saw they had bacon cheese fries, I started salivating. Unfortunately that gross ass marshmallow cheese reared its ugly fucking head again, and I was served this soggy mess that I still ended up eating most of, because garbage. Also, this guy started playing acoustic bar music, and took Kendra's request to play Matchbox 20's "3 A.M." He ruled. 

Dead Bars
Banner Pilot
That One Guy

Once I was filled up on mushy potatoes and canned cheese, it was time to once again head back to Tequila's and watch the awesome Canadian band The Creeps. I was pretty tired of criss-crossing the entire city of Ybor at this point, but I forced myself to do it one last time to head back to New World to watch Bad Cop/Bad Cop. I dilly dallied after their set because I was supposed to go and try to give Beach Slang a chance to win me over, but I really didn't want to, so I stayed at New World at watched Gatorface and Sharkanoid instead. Bad Cop was heading out to go get some pizza, so I went with them to redeem myself for that bullshit I ate earlier. Linh and A.J. wanted to go watch Lagwagon, which is always a good idea, so I followed them down to The Orpheum for the last band of Pre-Fest. At first Linh and I went up to the second floor to watch them, but A.J. walked backstage and got us back there, so I got to watch one of my favorite bands ever from the side stage. I also fixed the toilet in the green room because I'm a fucking nerd. After the show, we shot the shit in the parking lot for a little bit, and I got to fanboy out and ask Joey Cape for a picture. It was the perfect way to end Pre-Fest. Eventually I made my way back to the hotel to get some rest as the next day I had a 2 and a half hour bus ride to Gainesville, and 3 days left to be as much of a piece of shit as possible. 

Bad Cop/Bad Cop
Lagwagon
Fucking Nerd

Tun in next time as I finish off the weekend at the greatest party known to man, The Fest 14.